Saturday, January 10, 2009

At last, at last, a train ride at last!

After the past week, if you were not sick of hearing about Patrick salivating over the thought of riding on a train, I most certainly was. So much so, that I decided that instead of driving in the nice heated car to Grams and Opa's, I would take the future train conductor and his sidekick Smiley on the rails and try to put a stop to his incessant babblings. In the end, our little journey had just the opposite effect.

Because our trip was organized by the Johnson family, we were of course late. I checked the web for the train schedule, only to realize I should have looked sooner. The computer told me that I should have left the house ten minutes earlier and started making fun of me. What the computer didn't know was that I am married to Angie. We are late all the time and somehow always manage to make it. And, she makes fun of me on a bi-hourly basis so my tough skin simply laughed at the silly taunts. I took it as a challenge.

Trying to get the boys dressed and out of the house was not a mere challenge - it was an act of Papa, who was determined to show the computer and snickering Mama that getting to the train station was no laughing matter.

Two minutes after leaving the house, Peter began crying. He announced that he was tired and did not want to walk anymore. WHAT??!! You lazy little turd! We've taken, what, a total of twenty steps? Pop your snot bubble, soldier, and get marching.

In the end, bribes turned out to work much better than threats. I had a pack of strawberry licorice and promised them each two pieces if they ran the rest of the way. Never underestimate the power of candy. The kids took off like racecars and I'll let you analyze this picture and judge whether we made it or not.

When we got to our destination, we had to wait for a bus. This allowed the boys another ten minutes to make complete asses out of themselves. I normally only need two minutes to accomplish this goal, but they are still in train-ing. Get it?

All brilliantly witty puns aside, the boys had a blast making snow angels:

Shortly after this picture, Papa thought that it would also be brilliantly witty to give Peter a snow beard. In addition to snow beards and brilliant wit, Peter now also hates me. Whatever. His look of shock and realization, followed by his scowl of annoyed disapproval was so hilarious, I was forced to do it again. 'It was not funny the second time' is only true if you look at it from Peter's point of view.

Peter's tears dried as the bus pulled up and we continued on with our journey to Grams and Opa's heated home. After reaching our destination and warming up by the cozy fire, we all had cookies and coffee. Except Peter, David, Stephanie and Patrick, who only had cookies. And Tom, who only had the coffee, just without the coffee and sugar. Basically... milk: it does the body good and apparently makes you grin like the village idiot.

After cookies and milk, I assumed it would be nap time. Opa had a different and slightly less calming idea, though. He offered to take the boys on a tractor ride. Patrick immediately began singing the combine harvester song. I really worry about that boy sometimes.

Opa's garage is about a fifteen-minute car ride away. With Peter and Patrick singing, screaming, laughing and yelling in the back seat, the ride seemed more like 3 hours. In a fun kind of way, of course.

So yeah, we made it to Opa's garage with only minor hearing damage and fire up the tractor.

Patrick freaks. 'It's loud! I don't like it!' This is coming from the boy who thinks trains are groovy. Peter thought Patrick's fear was hilarious and started pointing and laughing. I joined in, but only for a few minutes. After that, we killed the engine and any notion of going on a tractor ride. I thought that going on a tractor ride would be a fun adventure that would not scare the holy crap out of the poor kid. In the end, though, our little journey, once again, had just the opposite effect.
Ladder Talk:
1) What was the best part of your day?
Peter: When I played today with Patrick on the train back from Grams and Opa. I think of an animal that is in this world and the others needed to guess what it is.
David: When Patrick again come 'cause I a big boy for ladder talk.

2) What was the worst part of your day?
Peter: When David was playing with his baby and he was throwing it.
David: When I cry 'cause my belly hurt.

3) What would you like to do tomorrow?
Peter: To play with Patrick red light, green light.
David: When I play with this spider man radio with Patrick.


  1. Thanks for the morning dose of laughter, as usual. How is Tom's teething? Has anything
    erupted yet?


  2. Luckily, teething so far has only been a lot of drooling and gumming anything that comes too close. I'm sure you will read when there are any "breakthroughs". :-)

  3. No blog entries since Jan. 10th??? Get on with it, you lazy bum!!! I'm going to be a regular reader.


  4. First of all, Doyle, if you are going to write an anonymous comment, you should really think about, um, I don't know, not signing it. Secondly, give me a freakin' break! I have been dealing with pukey-sick kids for the last two weeks, not to mention all the parties we had to throw after you left. Don't you have boxes to unpack?

  5. Still no new blog entry. What the hell are you doing on weekends, Steve?!? Bombfish