Saturday, April 26, 2014

Liberty Call

Liberty call: when sailors are released from the confinements of the ship and are allowed to go ashore for a designated amount of hours. 

Sailors are given a designated time to return to the ship because they have a tendency to lose their freakin' minds. I have found that kids are pretty much the same if you take them to Sea Life. Even though I didn't give them a curfew, I did set my beer watch when we got ashore. 

'Right! You guys go nuts, but we're leaving at 5:00 o'clock SHARP! And whatever you do, do not get eaten by any sharks!'

Tommy has apparently developed his listening skills from following David's lead.   

In a surprise move that shocked Angie and amazed me, the boys actually did a great job once we got inside. They listened to the tour guide without making farting noises. They refrained from banging on the fish tanks with their knuckles. And, nobody got arrested!

I was in the Navy for five years and I can honestly say that we never had a single Liberty Call that did not end up in farting, knuckles, and/or prison. Good job, mates!

I am a firm believer of rewarding good behavior, so we stopped at the gift shop on the way out.

'Alright, scallywags - you can all pick out one gift. ONE!'
I like that they call it a 'Gift Shop'. It makes it sound like they are giving away things for free. This is also what the kids apparently thought when they came back to my wallet with more toys than their greedy little hands could hold on to.

'Um, what part of 'ONE' did you guys not understand?'

Everyone sighed dramatically, turned around and huffed their way back to return the store to its shelves. Except David, who broke down into a snot-a-thon because he ABSOLUTELY HAD TO HAVE THE ORANGE FROG BECAUSE TOMMY HAD PICKED THE PURPLE FROG!'

I gently explained to my tear-soaked son that he could have the orange frog, but only if he put back the stuffed penguin that he was clutching rather dearly. What I didn't know, though, was that he ABSOLUTELY HAD TO HAVE THE PENGUIN, TOO.

It's no secret that I have little patience for kids that resort to extortion in public places. I thought that David would have known this by now, but it turns out that I had to give him a gentle reminder. In the end, David gently settled for the penguin. And now you can smile or you'll be gently walking home.

For those that would have caved in and think that Angie and I are horrible parents, we actually did buy the stupid frog, but we did so secretly and David will have to simply remain frog-less until his birthday.

On the way out, Lauri and Tommy ABSOLUTELY HAD TO WALK ON ROCKS.

They didn't even ask first, which concerned me a little until I consulted with my wallet.

'Ah, okay - you guys are good. Have fun and whatever you do, do not step on the stone that turns your head into a tiger.'

Lauri has apparently developed his listening skills from following Tommy's lead.

Ladder Talk:
1) What was the best part of your day?
Peter: That we went to the Sea Life - that was super cool!
David: When we went to the sea place and I got me a penguin. 
Tom: When we make Lauri's head into a tiger.

2) What was the worst part of your day?
Peter: That my belly and my head hurts and I think I need to throw up. 
David: That you buy me not the orange frog.
Tom: When we make Lauri's head into a tiger. 

3) What would you like to do tomorrow?
Peter: I want to trade with Arman Pokemon cards.
David: I want to go to Yuki's.
Tom: I want to go to the Lauri.

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