Saturday, May 18, 2013

Birthday Bouncers

I don't know about you, but something about this picture freaks me out. Perhaps it's the innocent smugs, or that they both actually looked into the camera, or maybe it's the fact that they somehow managed to stand still long enough for a photo op even though it was Lauri's birthday party and there was a gaggle of knee-highs in the background lining up to destroy Lauri's new trampoline.

'Hey!! Who the hell stole our kids and what are we going to do with these goofy looking robots?'

Before I could get my panic on, Tommy finally noticed the trampoline that the height-challenged ones had been screaming about since we had arrived. Poof!

As Tommy tried his damnedest to snap his own neck, Angie and I wished Sami and Katherina a pleasant romp and quietly exited the chaos. 

After a short coffee break back at the ranch, we rounded up Peter and David and headed out for the main mission for today - to buy a new dishwasher. Oh yeah - we are the poster family for excitement.   

Before embarking on our expensive journey, Peter demanded some time to spruce up. After five minutes of primping and preening, Peter emerged from the bathroom, all gussied up and ready to go.

'Wow, Peter. You,... you do realize that we're just going to buy kitchen appliances, right?'

'Yeah. How's my hair?'

'You're wearing a hat.'

I didn't wait for a witty retort; my wallet was already annoyed that it would be dishing out half a thou for a cleaning box, so I grabbed my credit card and moved out.

At least the sales guy amused me.

'Sure, this model might cost 400 bucks more, but it's got a special PARTY button that washes the dishes in 20 minutes.'

'Buddy, in the past two decades, I have never had an urgent need to wash dishes in 20 minutes. I'm gonna go with the model where you just push the start button and it goes.'

'Ok, but I would very highly recommend that you purchase the additional warranty package. For a hundred bucks, you can get full coverage for two years.'

'Are you telling me that these machines are such pieces of crap that they won't even last two years?'

'No, no, these are babies are solid, made to last decades'

'Yeah, thanks, but I think we'll skip the warranty. Do you guys deliver?'

It was around that point that we noticed the time. We were supposed to pick up Tom at 6:00, which meant we had approximately five minutes to make it to the other side of the city. We're the Johnsons, though, and on the way out of store we passed a Chinese restaurant.

'Man, those mini egg-rolls look yummy.'

Yup, you guessed it.

So, yeah - we stuffed ourselves and picked up Tommy around seven. After that, we went grocery shopping. As I already told you - we are the poster family for excitement.

When we finally made it home and got the boys settled, Angie informed me that Simone would be coming over and that they would be watching the Eurovision contest. For those of you lucky enough to have never had the pleasure, it's basically four and a half hours of Europe's crappiest karaoke.

I was frantically looking for a nice wall to smash my head into when I remembered that Veris was celebrating into his birthday. The best part - he was doing this at a pub. 

'So, you ladies have fun. Don't wait up for me, but if you do, make sure there's cold beer in the fridge. Ba-bye.'

I don't know about you, but something about this picture freaks me out. 

Perhaps it's the insane amount of combustible sticks that Lena felt compelled to jab into the cake, or that the birthday boy's wife damn near burnt the arm hairs off the poor guy cringing next to her, or maybe it's the fact that Veris was expected to blow out fire, even though he had just downed multiple shots of highly flammable whiskey. 
Ladder Talk:
1) What was the best part of your day?
Peter: When Mama take us to Rewe and we get the stickers that we are missing for our books.
David: When we can play on the iPad the whole time when you and Mama were the washer buying.
Tom: When I jump and do the flip-thing with Lauri.

2) What was the worst part of your day?
Peter: When you make fun of me why I ask you on my hair and I have a hat on.
David: As I on the sofa was and I fell on my neck.
Tom: When I fall down on the road and I get this owa here - look, Papa - here!'

3) What would you like to do tomorrow?
Peter: To go to Arman's.
David: I wanna dance like this - bogatady-smak-a-tady-foo. Yeah, maybe even two times.
Tom: I want to go to Lauri's why he so many new toys has.

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