Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Wild Turkeys

After Nil's last visit, the boys constantly asked where Dil was. We ignored the fact that they cannot even get her name right and explained that Dil was in Turkey. I shit you not, Peter cracked up at that statement for almost an hour.

'Papa, come on - she is with the turkeys? What is she doing with the turkeys?'

It was at that point that I broke out a globe and gave Peter his first-ever geography lesson. Afterwards, he felt so bad that he took Dil out to the pub for a drink to help smooth things over. Şerefe!

As Peter and Dil were toasting to foul play (yes, I crack myself up), Mama was busy terrorizing Tommy with his first-ever parade.


Judging by his petrified stare, he was not having any part of the street-based freak show that is known as 'Fasching' in Germany. It's kinda like Mardi Gras, just without the boobies and moon pies.

As if it wasn't bad enough that poor Tommy had to fight off street weirdos, he also had to deal with a foxy vampire brother who likes destroying things.


The boys lined up for the traditional throwing of the candy, followed by the more traditional kicking, shoving and biting that is inevitable when thirty kids dive for the same piece of stale bubble gum. In the end, my boys managed to bag quite a bit of the good stuff.

If pictures could talk, I would probably start freaking out. After I got used to it, though, I think that Peter would be saying 'I'm proud to be the candy-bag man'. David would be chanting 'We got your candy, and you can't have it' at the kids crying just off camera, and Martina would most likely be asking 'are we done yet?'.

I can only wish that we were done at that point. Angie and I still had the dreaded task of bringing the sugar-frenzied crew to bed. After getting them into pajamas, brushing their teeth, having them kiss Mama goodnight, reading a book and tucking them into bed, I opened a beer. Surprise, surprise.

After ten minutes, I heard strange noises coming from the bathroom and went to investigate. David was in the dark bathroom, standing on one leg trying to balance himself on our scale.

'Ah, what the hell are you doing?'

'I need know how heavy is my foot.'

'You mean you want to weigh yourself?'

'No, just my foot.'

'Okay, Einstein. Back to bed. I'll explain this one to you tomorrow.'


So then I moved on to beer number two. On my third chug, I mean sip, I heard what sounded like a box of CDs falling. I rushed into the boys' bedroom and saw a bunch of broken CD cases on the floor. Damn, I'm good!

I looked up at the top bunk and caught a very nervous Peter staring into Papa's headlights.

'Ah, what the hell are you doing?'

'I wanted a CD.'

'Obviously, but as I've told you for the last four nights, the CD player is still broken.'

Peter went on to explain how he had balanced the box of CDs on the railing of his bed and decided to play one 'with my hand'. By this, genius boy meant that he had put the CD in the broken machine and started spastically spinning it until his flailing arm lost control and whacked the CD box that was so delicately perched on the edge of his bed.

'Okay, Einstein. Back to bed. I'll explain this one to you tomorrow.'
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Ladder Talk:
1) What was the best part of your day?
Peter: When we had so many sweets from Fasching.
David: When I goed to the Fasching parade.

2) What was the worst part of your day?
Peter: When Chiara needed to go.
David: When Tommy hit me.

3) What would you like to do tomorrow?
Peter: To play darts and win with Papa.
David: To play with Chiara and Alessio.

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