Thursday, July 17, 2008

Knock, knock...


I was out of town yesterday and today on business, leaving Angie to fend for herself against our two adorable, yet slightly devilish, young hooligans. For some strange reason, they tend to become more mischievous when fed only microwave food; an unavoidable situation when I am gone since stoves apparently frighten Angie.

It started last night when the boys somehow convinced Angie that the very strict bedtime routine that I enforce every night could just be chucked out the window with no consequences. Ah, you foolish mortal.

Instead of sleeping in their own beds, Angie had the brilliant idea that they should pile into our bed and take my place. I have to say, that was not so smart.

Next came the wonderful suggestion from Angie that instead of the normal ONE book for Peter and ONE book for David, she would read ten books to both of them. Ok, that was just dumb.

To top off the evening, Angie's brain went WAY past overdrive and began to overheat. She paid no attention to the time and allowed the tiny gremlins to stay up two and a half hours longer than I would ever allow. I'm thinking of a word that describes you. It begins with 'st' and rhymes with cupid...

It would be nice to fantasize that having kids go to bed three hours later than usual would somehow equate to them sleeping an additional three hours in the morning. No. Let me repeat for those with slight reading loss. No.

David woke up this morning at 0' dark-thirty and jumped on Peter's stomach. They then sat on Mama's head long enough to wake her, but not long enough to really motivate her to chase after them as they ran off into the living room giggling. Angie hit her internal snooze button, a subtle mistake that boys like ours can smell a mile away.

Angie is awoken half an hour later with Peter poking her eyeball and gleefully announcing 'David pee on the sofa'. Not a nice way to wake up, but not completely undeserved.

Angie managed to clean up the mess without teaching the boys a few 'new' words, although there are very few they haven't already 'learned' from Papa. In addition to the sofa, David apparently found it hilarious to pee all over his clothes, a pillow, and came damn close to 'marking' the cat. Angie picked up his clothes and took them to the laundry room.

We have a very loud dryer and switching it on normally blocks out any noises in the house, including our children, so I can certainly see the appeal. Angie may have lingered in the laundry room a little too long, though.

David, now dry and frantically looking for new ways to drive Mama over the edge, decided to open the front door, walk out into the hallway and shut the door. With only two plants, our hallway is rather boring, so eventually he wanted to come back in.

Knock, knock.

Nothing.

Mmm...hello. Knock, knock. I seem to have somehow...well, I don't know how to put this. I'm so embarrassed....I'm sure it happens to all of us at one point...Well, ok... I'm locked out.

Nothing.

Ok, I get it. I pee on the sofa and you lock me out. I'm sorry. Lesson learned, okay? Let me in.

Nothing.

Alright, I said I'm sorry. It's cold out here, I can't reach the doorbell, and the timed light just switched off. I'm really starting to freak out here. Now open the freakin' door. Please.

Angie was still hiding behind the curtain of laundry noise masking David, who was now screaming at the top of his lungs in the hallway. Eventually, Angie made her way back to the living room. She paused for a second, wondering where those muffled screams that sounded eerily like David were coming from. To make a short story long, she found David and at the same time scored mega points with the elderly neighbor from upstairs who has perfect hearing and, oddly enough, an intense curiosity whenever a stranded baby is screaming its head off in our stairwell.

Obviously since I was gone at a nice and quiet, although somewhat boring conference, I can only reconstruct the details as described by Angie. What was missing, though, was the photo, since I had the camera with me. After Angie explained this story to me, I promptly grabbed our camera and told David to follow me.

He jumped up, excited at what he perceived to be a new game. I opened the front door and told him to go outside. There was an ever-so-slight hesitation, which I found odd since we are normally fighting to keep him on the inside. He still went out, though, which probably says something about his personality, but you know what? He's two, so go analyze yourself.

I would normally expect him to race out to the middle of the hallway. This time, though, he slowly and hesitantly strolled out, looking nervously back at me in the doorway. I did not want to disappoint his expectations, so I slammed the door shut. The picture featured here is from the inside of our apartment, looking out through window pane in our door, at a very unsure David who has now run back to the door to see why it has just shut. Probably even more confusing is why Papa is standing there with a camera, grinning. Knock, knock...
--------------------------------------------
1) What was the best part of your day?
Peter: When I watch my two or three shows and then when Sami come home early.
David: When Papa first my book.

2) What was the worst part of your day?
Peter: When David says everyday he's Spiderman and then he goes on MY ladder. That I don't like.
David: When my head hurts on my bed.

3) What would you like to do tomorrow?
Peter: To build up the animals and maybe we can play 'King'.
David: My book and...red.

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