Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Or would you rather be a fish?

Babies can't stink. At least, this was my naive assumption before having three boys. I can now confirm that not only do they reek, but they also like to pee in the tub. Last week, the midwife recommended waiting several more weeks before giving a bath and suggested using moist cloth towels to keep Pig-Pen clean. She also suggested using diapers made out of bio-degradable hemp, but she was probably just high. I am sure if we just let our kids go and hug those nice smelling trees, they would never need a bath, but selfish little me does not like to gag.

One quick side note - in researching this entry, I could not remember Pig-Pen's name so I googled it. Let me say two things:

1) If you ever need to conduct a similar search, you need to include more search words than just "dirty" and "snoopy"
2) There are some sick, twisted people out there.

Speaking of sick and twisted people, Peter and David went to the dentist today. The drill freak followed my modus operandi and bribed the kids into submission with the promise of a toy if they behaved well. Oddly enough, they did, and twenty minutes later, my well-behaved hooligans each got a rubber fish to play with.

Yippee, doc. Whoopee. Yee-haw. Let's go ride them...fish. Fish?! Cut back on the nitrous oxide and invest in some wind-up dinosaurs or transformer bugs. Come on, rubber fish?

The kids loved them anyway. Especially David. He petted his, licked it, and carried it around for almost an hour before shoving it in a tiny tube at the local bakery. Unlike the fresh rolls, there was no way of getting the fish out of there. I tried looking at the bright side and saw it as a way for David to learn to stop shoving things where they don't belong. David looked at the dark side and saw it as a way to test out his lungs. They work, by the bye.

Peter quickly picked up on his little brother's sad predicament and seemed genuinely concerned. 'Aw, Davey lost his fish? That's too bad, because I still have mine and it is SO much FUN to play with. If I lost my fish, I would really be sad and cry'. To that, let me just say two things:

1) If your kid ever conducts a similar taunt, you need to include more disciplinary statements than just 'good one, Peter' and 'man, that was so funny'
2) There are some strict, humorless moms out there.
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Ladder Talk:
1) What was the best part of your day?
Peter: When I was excited for the bath.
David: When Ruaidhri come, ok?

2) What was the worst part of your day?
Peter: When I couldn't do a bath.
David: Christoph bite my finger, ok?

3) What would you like to do tomorrow?
Peter: To go to the zoo.
David: I go'ed mit Mama and you and Peter and Dalia in your house, ok?

4 comments:

  1. He is precious!! Can't wait to meet him..give him a hug from Oma.

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  2. Thanks! I can't wait for you to change him...I mean, meet him too. Your virtual hug has been delivered and if I understood him correctly, he sends a virtual burp back to you.

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  3. Those are Steve´s legs in the background!!!

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  4. You can tell that by the lack of hair. The hairy ones belong to Angie.

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