Friday, July 10, 2009

Honeymooner's View

Road Trip Day 6: Party, revisited
The odd looking couple staring out the window are actually Lisa and Mick, the dayoldweds. Before any conclusions are jumped at, I was not camped out in the bushes waiting for them pass by in their robes. We were actually walking to the car when I turned to see Mick beating against the glass like a madman. Damn, Mick - you've only been married one day and you're already trying to escape?

As it turns out, Mick's little reenactment of The Graduate's final scene ('Elaine! Elaine!') was actually an attempt to get our attention. I think they just wanted to show off how big their honeymoon suite was for just the two of them, knowing damn well that our family of five was shacked up in the room with only a double bed. Thanks, Ben.

As we checked out of the hotel, the boys decided to help with the bags.

Okay, actually they just got in the way and were being complete ass-pains, but at least we were checking out, not in. We moved on to the next hotel for day two of partying with the Irishweds. Hey! WTF, Angie - how come I didn't get to party for two days?

After checking into the new hotel, Angie managed to really crack me up.

I don't think she meant to, but still. I know funny (look at who I married) and I say that cosmetic bags that explode because your inept fingers did not properly close the lid to your spray-on fake tan are pretty damn funny.

With no more tan juice, Angie looked like the next poster mama for Wite-Out.

I came to her rescue with a pale ale. Get it? Angie has many, many, many problems and here we see yet another one of them. It is virtually impossible to get Angie to keep her eyes open when a camera flash goes off.

She also sneezes when she looks at the sun, so perhaps she just had a really traumatic experience with light when she was growing up. Group therapy might help, but who else would attend? Maybe Gizmo with his fear of 'bright light', but Angie is horrible at not feeding after midnight and the last thing we need is more Gremlins running around the house.

Adults in Ireland are expected to drink. Kids are expected to dance. Angie and I are normally crap with rules, but that's because they are German rules.
  1. ACHTUNG! Zer' vill be no crossing za street if ze little mann ist rot!
  2. ACHTUNG! You vill sveep za stairvell vonce a veek!
  3. ACHTUNG! You must vear black socken ven you vear shorts!
Irish rules kick ass. Riverdance and Guinness - I love zis country.

At some point, David walked over to Peter, who was dancing with 'the tall one'. I picture the sequence of events going something like this.

'Hey Peter - can I cut in?'

'No. Go away.'


Peter must have felt really bad for making David cry, for he stopped smiling for almost three whole seconds before returning to 'the tall one'.

In the end, Caine and Able worked it out. Thankfully, it was without the use of any boulders and in the end, everyone still managed to have a ball.

'Rock on, Ireland!'
Ladder Talk:
1) What was the best part of your day?
Peter: When I played with Annelies.
David: When I played with that lady, but they are already home, I think.

2) What was the worst part of your day?
Peter: When Davey woke up and he was in a horrible noise.
David: When I play with Tom not.

3) What would you like to do tomorrow?
Peter: To get breakfast and play with the Annelies when she's there.
David: When I play with Tom.


  1. Maybe Gizmo with his fear of 'bright light'... and the photo sequence of the "Tall One" brother drama unfolding.. LMAO!! Too Funny.. Great stuff, Steve :)

  2. What an 'enlightened' post...