Ladder Talk

Ladder Talk is a ritual started with my oldest son, Peter. There is a small wooden step ladder next to his bed and for the last year or so, he sits on the ladder before going to bed to answer the following three questions:

1) What was the best part of your day?
2) What was the worst part of your day?
3) What would you like to do tomorrow?

You'd be surprised by some of the answers you get. You spend the entire day taking him to the zoo, then the swimming pool, and top it all off with a trip to the candy store. Then you get home, slap on the PJs on and settle down for that night's ladder talk, confident that the many hours you have invested would payoff. You ask the first question, certain that one of the many memories you have created that day would be selected as ladder talk's "best part of the day". Then, with the honest innocence that only a four-year old can get away with, comes the answer "When Mommy let me turn on the vacuum".

What? You little shit - I spend 8 hours running my ass around the city trying to fill your day with bonding moments of laughter and joy and it's the on/off switch of a Hoover that floats your boat? You know what? Next time, let Mommy drag your ass all over town and I'll stay at home and show you how the toilet flushes, or let you hit the start button on the laundry machine, or some other mindless task that will obviously rank high on your list of memories to cherish. Thanks, Mommy.