Friday, October 10, 2008

The Fly-by Visitor

I have always told my kids not to go up and hug strangers. I forgot, however, to tell them not to go up and hug strange looking people. This odd-looking goof ball is my Dad, also known as Pop-Pop, also known as Ice-Pop, also known as 'please stop teaching curse words to my children'. I asked him to tone it down and reminded him that he had children once. 'I remember', he smirked.

I dropped off Peter at kindergarten and built the playpen for Tom. Playpen is just a play-ful word for prison, though. It's got bars and a wall that little Tommy-Q could never climb, so why not just release the prisoner on the carpet and slap on one of those electro-shock ankle bracelets to zap him if he gets too close to the stairs?

As I was putting together the playpen, I was reminded that yet again Angie was right. I really hate admitting this - probably because it happens way too often. After David had outgrown the playpen, I wanted to turn it into a kick-ass poker table for Papa. It is a hexagon and the perfect size for a good blackjack table. Angie balked and made some silly comment about one day having more kids. Ok, she was right.

Whenever Angie is right, it always makes me think of the one time when I was right. Excuse the flashback, but it started way back when Angie and I were dating...

It was our second date, to be specific. We decided to go to a Mexican restaurant for a nice dinner followed by indigestion. We arrived and carried on nervous chit-chat as the waiter served us. We ordered the food and waited. And waited. And waited. Finally, not sure if I should reveal at that early stage what an asshole I can be, I called the waiter over and asked what the hell was taking our burritos so long.

Not-so-speedy Gonzalez turned beet red, apologized, and ran off to the kitchen to place the order we had made the hour before. He returned with two shots as an apology. He placed them on the table and disappeared crying.

Angie asked me what I thought they were. 'Probably Tequila', I said. She told me it was too dark to be tequila, so I lifted my glass to smell it. Angie did as well, but there was one slight difference between the two. Mine was filled to a little red line about a quarter inch below the top. Angie's was filled to the brim.

I smelled mine and watched as Angie delicately lifted hers to her nose and then proceeded to inhale half of the shot up her nose. She started coughing, spitting, gagging and what could only be described as screaming as I laughed my ass off and pointed at her. Even the waiter started cracking up. Five minutes later when she regained her composure, she acknowledged that it was Tequila. I was right.

This afternoon, I picked up Peter and told him we had to go meet a 'surprise visitor'. The guessing started immediately.

Is it Eisi?


Is it Barbara?


Is it Superman?

Uh... does Superman have a mustache and drink Jack Daniel´s?

Barbara and Eisi should be honored that Peter put them on his list before Superman, but I am not sure what this says about the frequency and likelihood of their visits.

We showed up at the hotel to find Super Pop-Pop out front waiting for us. Needless to say, the boys were shocked and thrilled. Not to pop Pop-Pop's bubble, but David finds anything with a hairy lip interesting.

By looking at the suitcase that Ice-Pop had brought with him, I thought he would be staying for weeks. Seeing later the number of VERY LOUD toys he brought with him, I understood how he packed for his two-day visit. I thanked him for the VERY LOUD toys and reminded him how lovely those types of gifts are for parents. He grinned and gave me a sly smile - 'I remember'.

We spent the rest of the night trying to calm the boys down. My Dad did his part by giving them candy, chasing them around, and betting them on who could stay up the longest. I tried telling my Dad that if the kids don't get to bed early, they won't sleep longer and they will just be horrible in the morning. To this, wise old Pop-Pop smiled and said once again, 'I remember.'
Ladder Talk:
1) What was the best part of your day?
Peter: When Pop-Pop come and he gave us surprises.
David: When Pop-Pop play mit me that light thing.
Pop-Pop: The best part of today was that I came and saw my grandsons Peter, David, and Thomas and I got to bring presents from me and Oma.

2) What was the worst part of your day?
Peter: When David bonked his head.
David: When he a bad boy.
Pop-Pop: They didn't have Jack Daniel´s on the plane and I had to drink Scotch and it made me gag, but I somehow made it through.

3) What would you like to do tomorrow?
Peter: To go swimming with Pop-Pop at the hotel.
David: To go mit Peter and Pop-Pop - that Papa from Papa.
Pop-Pop: We're gonna go swimming and we're gonna play cards. I'll teach you how to gamble.

1 comment:

  1. Hey, I want to read more about the crazy antics of that Dalia girl! And her Dad's pretty cool too.