Over the many, many, many, many years since her conception, Angie the rat has horded, in addition to Mr. Smorgasbord, the following items:
- Pokey, a dog knitted by Grams. The fact that Grams was knitting should indicate just how old this little treasure has been collecting dust.
- Lurky, the big-nosed color-hater from the RainbowBrite commune. I have a big nose and I hated 'The Color Purple', but hopefully Lurky is not the reason why Angie loves, adores, and worships me so much.
- A Ziploc baggie of hair from Angie's first haircut. Ok, that is just plain disgusting. What's next? Toe nail clippings? Skin flakes? A basket for It to put the lotion in?
- Two braids from when Grams was a child. Ah, that explains where she gets it from.
The lights look like crap!
Thanks, O' great bringer of joy and happiness. I think Tom is burpy.
We ignored Negative Nancy and her little injection of holiday spirit. After the many boxes of bulbs were emptied, I asked if we would be putting on tinsel this year. The word tinsel apparently makes Grams giggle and crack up laughing for two minutes and thirty-four seconds, although I am not sure why. Ok, no more eggnog for Grams.
She tried to score points with Ms. Pac-rat by showing her how much she likes marshmallows. Angie was...how do I put this? Not amused. Slightly irritated. An unhappy camper. Barbara was...how do I put this? Not giving a shit. Papa was...how should I put this? Abso-freakin-lutely loving the impending WWF Sister Smackdown.
Lola continued to chew on Angie's childhood collectible until it had no arms and could no longer Stay Puft. It did, however, start making rather odd whistling noises that clearly made Angie mad and Peter jealous.
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Ladder Talk:
1) What was the best part of your day?
Peter: To see a present already under the tree even when it's Christmas not.
David: When I say goodnight to Mama and Tom.
2) What was the worst part of your day?
Peter: When David's belly hurt.
David: When Tom and I cry 'cause I owa here in my belly.
3) What would you like to do tomorrow?
Peter: To go to Toys-R-Us.
David: When Peter here sleep.
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